Episode Transcript
[00:00:12] Welcome back to another edition of UnlEashed Athletics. I'm your host, Brian Bonn. Excited to be with you this week. Continue to get wonderful feedback week over week and just want to say thank you. Make sure you're sharing it, make sure you're liking the material, ask questions. I've had some great engagement through social media and I just want to say thank you. It's been a lot of fun to take this on and learn about different things that are going on in people's lives all around the idea of youth sports. You know, youth sports being youth sports, high school sports and even some collegiate sports. I've had some really interesting conversations around the collegiate level. We'll get into those topics a little later as we bring on guests and do those things. But just wanted to say thank you and continue to be in awe by you engaging in this conversation with me. So thank you as always. Today is episode number eight.
[00:01:11] Episode number eight is going to be one that probably has multiple layers to it, but we're going to step into it today and we're going to step into what tryouts and cuts look like. We're going to take the perspective of the coach today. I think the coach has a very difficult position that they sit in. It's almost a lose lose for them. But I wanted to bring in some energy that maybe parents you haven't heard yet, players maybe you haven't thought about yet. And for coaches, I just want to. I just want to push you forward and be able to say you're doing your job. I know it's not easy and, and let's try to figure this thing out together. So tryouts and cuts. I really want four things to be talked about today. The first one is you need to know coaches lose sleep over this stuff.
[00:02:03] Take it easy on them.
[00:02:05] The second thing is feedback is important and we continue to talk about this.
[00:02:10] Caring for people is even more important and we'll get into that topic in a little bit here. Number three, tryouts really should be short and sweet. You're not going to learn that much more about a player by doing a two week tryout rather than a one week or you are going to know your players pretty quickly.
[00:02:33] And number four, if you are cut, it's time to move forward.
[00:02:38] Stop trying to justify, stop saying coach plays favorites or picks favorites. Go get better or do something new. So those are the four things we're going to talk about today. I hope you're excited to jump into these. As always, I am not looking to stir the pot. I am trying to evaluate based off of 20 years of experience, really, at the high school level. But I did do some youth sports along the way as well, and I was a collegiate athlete, so I took all these things as I went along and made mental notes so that I could be a better coach at the end of the day. So going back to number one, coaches lose sleep over this stuff. Take it easy on them.
[00:03:21] You have to understand that coaches don't want to have to make cuts, but they have to make cuts.
[00:03:29] It's a non negotiable. If you. I'm going to use baseball as the example today. If you keep a roster of 20, you're already losing the battle. Parents will be upset that their kid isn't playing enough and they are paying so much money to be a part of your program that it's unfair that these kids are sitting the bench so much. So it's not an option.
[00:03:51] You gotta understand that. So as they're making decisions on who to keep and who not to keep, you have to understand that every single kid matters to them and the struggle is real for them, that that struggle is hard. They're not caring for just your kid. They're caring for every single kid that tried out. I remember years where we had 80 kids trying out for our program and only 50 spots available. That means 30 kids were going home in tears. And if you think that coaches didn't stay up late at night going, what can we do? Is there anything we can do to get this kid better? Is there any way we can keep one more instead of that 50? Can we keep 51? Those are real things that coaches go through. And as parents, I just think you need to hone in on that. A little bit of coaches have such a caring heart. They get paid next to nothing to do this. And to have to deliver bad news before the season even begins is not something that they desire to do. They are not looking to hurt kids. They are not going after your kid. They are making a decision that is best for the entire program. And whether your son or daughter does or does not make a team does not stop them for caring along the way. Now, can coaches get better at that? Absolutely. And that really takes us to the next point. We know coaches are losing sleep over this. It is not an easy situation to grab onto. The second thing is the feedback is important, but caring for people is even more important.
[00:05:30] Okay, we've talked about feedback.
[00:05:32] If you want parents, kids, anybody else, to understand why you build your teams the way you do, have a metric base for it. The numbers don't lie. We've already talked about it, so I'm not going to hone in any longer on that. But along the way, they can't just be a digit. They can't be the 85 miles an hour fastball. So they make the team. They need a name, they need to be cared for and. And they need to know that you knew them further than just being a baseball player. Let me say it again, coaches, you need to understand that they need to be more than just a number. Okay? There's a going to be a kid that can only throw 40 miles an hour at the high school tryout. And that's okay because that's where they're at. And there's going to be a kid that throws 95 miles an hour. And that's okay because that's where they're at. But you cannot treat them differently because they're 45 miles an hour to 95 miles an hour. One might make the team and one might not. But the way you care for them along the way is incredibly important.
[00:06:43] That's incredibly important to the parent who is at home nervous about whether or not their kid did well enough today to make the team. It is important to the athlete who is nervous as they're going up against their friends, players that are better than them and players that are not as good as them. They are nervous beyond belief. And you caring for them differently makes a huge difference.
[00:07:12] It is a huge difference.
[00:07:15] You have to understand that when you care for athletes, the numbers will make sense to them. But they knew that the coach cared for them along the way and they will take that news better if they are going to get cut. They are going to take that news better if they make JV. But they thought they were going to make varsity. Now, does that mean a conversation isn't coming? No, that's not what it means. But it means that they're building trust with you because they know that you know that they matter.
[00:07:48] Take care of them, please.
[00:07:51] Feedback is important.
[00:07:55] Caring for people is even more important. Coaches, I hope you hear that clearly. Families, I hope you're nodding your head. Yes. Yes, I'm in agreement with that.
[00:08:06] Okay. The third thing, it's controversial, but I have learned that the days just don't matter. So tryouts really should be short and sweet. We aren't going to learn a lot more by adding addition, additional days. You know, the. The only time that I've really seen that play out where it was worthwhile was it had nothing to do with whether or not a kid was going to make a team or not, it had to do with placement within the program. Were they going to be a varsity pitcher or a JV pitcher?
[00:08:44] Were they going to be a shortstop backup at the varsity level or a JV starter? Those were things where I wish I would have had one more day to look at them. But I knew I could make adjustments along the way if I needed to, and I was going to have an honest conversation when that time came. But the additional day of tryout wasn't going to give me enough information to be able to make that decision that day. And so for me, I would rather tryouts be short and sweet.
[00:09:15] Cut to the chase, build your team and start working with your team as quickly as possible.
[00:09:21] People who say it needs to be at least a week. No, it doesn't. Especially in the game of baseball where you've been practicing indoors and outdoors for the last seven months. The coach has seen you so much and there, there's just no reason to have that many days of tryouts. Also, if you have metrics, the metrics don't lie. How hard you throw on Monday versus Thursday doesn't matter. They have a general idea of what your metric is going to be and, and they know where you sit and could you flop a high score or could you have a bad week and flop a low score? Yeah, you bet you could. But generally speaking, if you're testing early and testing often, tryouts should be short and sweet. You cut to the chase, you care for people along the way, and then you move forward. You start building your team as quickly as possible.
[00:10:14] What you shouldn't do is start building your team while everybody else is trying out.
[00:10:21] Give everybody a fair tryout. Now, you might in the back of your head go, that, that's my shortstop. That's my, that's my number one pitcher, and that's great. But don't start putting them off to the side, treating them differently. Whatever you might do that is inappropriate for a tryout period. Every person should go through the exact same tryout, and when you're done trying them out, they should all go through the exact same conversation. Those conversations could look differently, but they're getting a conversation, is all I mean by that. And from there, you break the news and you move forward. You, you post your teams, you send an email out, you let everybody know. You thank everybody for trying out after you've had those individual conversations and you move forward and that's it. That really is how quickly it needs to be. I would say for a high school tryout 80 to 120 kids trying out, go ahead and do a three day tryout. If you need four, okay. I would say that's fine. If you're upwards of 100 kids, you might need four days, but three day tryout, let's go and then let's be done and let's move forward. I think you will have a general idea and always, always, always, you should tell your players that there's an opportunity to move up and there's an opportunity to move down. They have to earn their position daily. It is not solidified because day one, they're a varsity athlete. Absolutely. Move them down. If they're not supposed to be there, get them better. And then if they can return back up, go ahead and return them back up. But let's be sure we're being very articulate with you have earned the position today and you need to earn the position every day moving forward. Okay. And then the final thing is, if you are cut, it's time for you to move forward. We don't need to have meeting after meeting with coach of why he doesn't see your talent, why people are telling you that he didn't like your son to begin with. So he's not going to ever get a fair shot within the program.
[00:12:25] We're just not going to play those games. If you're cut, go get better or go do something new, you choose.
[00:12:35] It's not up to me to tell you how to live your life, but I will tell you that going family after family the week of cuts, coming in and telling a coach, you just didn't like my kid, you just didn't give him a fair shot. He had a bad week, he was tired. All of those different things all point back to a root cause that's really, really important. And it's that you're not allowing your kid to fail enough.
[00:13:01] You're not allowing them to accept difficult information that truly will make them better in the game of life. It is okay if you don't make the team this year.
[00:13:15] It is inspiring if you do make a team this year, but please don't start writing a story in your head that is untrue. Don't start writing a story that other people helped you write. Go in if you absolutely need to and have a conversation with the coach if you really feel like you missed it, but otherwise, move on, move forward.
[00:13:46] Learn to be better.
[00:13:49] Face adversity differently.
[00:13:52] I just think so much time is spent on telling coaches why they were wrong rather than having a conversation of how can he get better.
[00:14:04] What can he do to be his very best? How did he fall short during the tryout? And if we figure those things out, we are going to be in a much different situation with our coaches families. You're going to have a much different perspective with those coaches and players.
[00:14:25] You're going to have a laser focus. If you really want to make that team, you will have a laser focus of what you need to do to get better.
[00:14:36] Period.
[00:14:37] End of story. So that's kind of where we end today.
[00:14:42] Spring tryouts are right around the corner.
[00:14:45] And I just want you to hear that if you make a team, congratulations. And if you miss the team, that's okay.
[00:14:55] You are still loved.
[00:14:57] You still have great plans ahead of you. And if you desire to be even better, go get it. But do the work.
[00:15:06] Be ready for the next tryout that you have. Whether that's fall ball, whether that's a summer team, whether that's a club team, whether that's the high school team. You get yourself ready and you prove that you're supposed to be there. And if you're not supposed to be there, I can't wait to find out what's in store for you next.
[00:15:28] I can't wait to see, while you love the game of baseball, what might be lying around the corner for you that you're going to be so much better at, that you just never had time for because baseball was in the way.
[00:15:45] And by the way, this is for any sport. I know I'm speaking specifically at baseball right now, but if you're not a great soccer player, if you're not a great wrestler, if you're not a great track star, if you're not a great baseball player, if you're not a great tennis player, a golfer, whatever it might be, it's okay because there will be something you are going to be great at. And I can't wait to see what that is.
[00:16:13] Parents be encouraged by this. Yes, you put a lot of money into what they've done. But at the end of the day, it's okay that it's not that thing. It's okay that it might be something different.
[00:16:27] And it's okay that while the money might feel like it went down the drain, there are so many lessons that were learned along the way that someday you will look back on and appreciate that it'll all be worth it. It'll all connect together and you will love every single minute of whatever your son or daughter has planned next. I finished with this. Good luck to everybody.
[00:16:53] Tryout week is no fun. No fun for the coaches, no fun for the players, and definitely not fun for the parents. But I wish you great luck. I hope that your son or daughter performs at the very highest level that they're able to. And I hope that, coaches, you are the most caring people while still giving appropriate feedback along the way. And parents, I really do hope that you are encouraging your son or daughter through the whole tryout process. I love to watch you play. I'm so thankful for the abilities that you have and I can't wait for you to come home tomorrow and tell me more about tryouts.
[00:17:32] So that's what we got. I hope that's helpful. Always more to learn. But the tryout week and the cuts are weeks that nobody looks forward to. And I just want you to know that you're heard and you're known. While it's not an easy conversation, it's one that happens in the workforce, in sports, and everything else you're going to do.
[00:17:55] Go do the work. It's going to be a great week.
[00:17:58] We'll see you soon.
